What if she does not deserve my love and affection?

These days there are several guys who want to get married but are not able to find the girl of their dreams. I am talking about Indian guys. I have come across several guys who say that they have been browsing several matrimonial sites themselves while their family and extended family untiringly search for the appropriate girl for this boy. The process is taking a few years for some. The guys do not like most of the girls. One of my friends when asked what he wants in a girl he said it is enough if the girl is not evil or wicked. I was shocked to hear that.

Another friend of mine has been searching for a girl to marry from more than a year. He is very disappointed with every girl he meets. What is going wrong here? Is it really true that today’s girls are so bad? Why is it that the demand and supply are not in sync? How come so many girls are not matching the requirements of the guys and vice versa? I heard that if the guy finally likes the girl she rejects him for reasons like he is not an NRI, is not a software professional, does not earn enough etc. Are they trying to find a life partner to lead a happy peaceful life or some thing else?

My friend here says that he has seen couple of his friends who are fulfilling the role of a wife, mother, daughter in law, sister in law etc perfectly. He is trying to search for a girl who is like that. He is not able to find a girl who matches his wish list. But how can he? I mean how does he know if the girl can fit all those roles by talking to her for a few days? I am positive she can and will fulfill the different roles if you cooperate with her. Marriage is never a one man army. It is a game played by two as partners and they have to match their ideas and views to get on well. It is a relationship you develop while living together not some thing to be found ready made.

He asks me what if she does not deserve my love and affection. That is a very wrong thing to say. When you love some one you should do so without being selfish. Give her your love with out expecting anything in return and you will be surprised to see what she has to offer. If you ask me, nobody is evil or bad by nature. People around them, circumstances and some situations make them behave that way. As long as you are a loving and caring person the other person will be the same with you. There is a saying:

Ask not go on giving, waves of happiness will come forward to wet your feet. You need not move forward to reach them.

It is so true. If you don’t have any expectations you will appreciate what you have in life. Don’t get me wrong I am not saying don’t be ambitious. I mean to say that with a huge wish list in your hand no single girl is going to fit your dream girl role and you will be disappointed later for not finding the right girl. Be reasonable and accept the fact that you are not a perfect guy either. I am really surprised to hear from some people their wish lists. I just cannot see how a girl who matches that list will agree to marry this guy as he will never match her list.