Do you create an image or determine the personality of a stranger just by talking to them over phone or reading their emails or chatting with them? This is more common now because of the social networking age we are in. We are most likely to make more virtual friends than ever and sometimes who knows they might become your best buddies.
I am a very anti social person. I am not into any of the social networking sites and I am particularly paranoid when it comes to interacting with strangers. I don't take such risks and the people around me do not encourage anything of that sorts.
I have a vivid imagination. This started when I was very young. I used to listen to songs in radio and have my own video of the song in my head. I used to be very disappointed when that song was played on Chitrahhar (TV program) because the director did not do any justice to the lyrics or the context of the song. I am quite sure I will become a very good director if at all I consider movie direction as my profession :)
I am very good at creating mental images. Even when I read novels, I create a whole movie in my head and I am quite confident it would be much better than any movie which is based on that novel :) Now, coming to mental images - how are they made? I was reading an article in some science website, and it says that your mental images are a result of many factors. Your upbringing, surroundings, your attitude etc. So if you and I are interacting with the same person, you might have a completely different mental image than that of mine.
But surprisingly it is not the same if we both see the person physically. Based on their physical appearance we might end up having some common opinions about that person. That is because of the society we live in and some of the misconceptions.
A few years ago I started blogging at a major blogging site and interacted with many bloggers via comments, some became very good friends as we shared some common views on some of the topics discussed etc. I exchanged emails with some of them and had a certain image including their physical appearance:). I personally feel that reading someones work gives you a very good insight into who they are and how they think. Especially if you have written 100's of articles, your true self comes out and it's really hard to hide. That thinking is what gave me courage to make virtual friends through the blogger's world.
I became very close friends with couple of them after reading every single post of the 100's they published. One of them happened to live very close to my house and I met her a few times. Went over to her house for lunch, she came to our house. The mental image I had about her based on her writings and our conversations over phone and chat is almost similar to the the real person. So obviously I thought I am good at this.
The other person I met virtually, a very good friend of mine, proved to be different. I met him in person he turned out to be totally different than my mental image. How strange! It works for some and does not for others? Or was it just fluke that the first person happened to match my mental image but not the second one. How does this work?
Virtual friendship eliminates the guessing element about the other person's personality in the sense that you became friends because of the shared interest to start with, the site where you met. I met my friends on a blogger site, so we both like to write. Narrowing down, we both have similar opinions the way we commented on others posts or the way we commented on each others writings. You might not necessarily like every single thing they wrote about, some categories might be even alien to you, but you don't mind reading about them. 75% of the time you liked their work. That is enough I guess.
We are simply drawn to those people in whose presence we feel comfortable. There are some friends with whom we “just click,” and we recognize early on that our personalities are a good match. And with virtual friends the awkwardness of meeting in person is gone because you are sitting in your pajamas in your own home when you are talking/chatting with them. It is like talking to a family member. You can't take away the comfort zone that you have with a virtual friend.
So if your gut instinct says it is okay to be friends with someone you never met or you don't know much about, I think it is okay. That said, you might be dealing with someone who is completely different than what you have in mind. So we should always be careful but if you are really comfortable with someone be it virtual or real, it is perfectly okay to continue the friendship. It's okay to be happy!
I am a very anti social person. I am not into any of the social networking sites and I am particularly paranoid when it comes to interacting with strangers. I don't take such risks and the people around me do not encourage anything of that sorts.
I have a vivid imagination. This started when I was very young. I used to listen to songs in radio and have my own video of the song in my head. I used to be very disappointed when that song was played on Chitrahhar (TV program) because the director did not do any justice to the lyrics or the context of the song. I am quite sure I will become a very good director if at all I consider movie direction as my profession :)
I am very good at creating mental images. Even when I read novels, I create a whole movie in my head and I am quite confident it would be much better than any movie which is based on that novel :) Now, coming to mental images - how are they made? I was reading an article in some science website, and it says that your mental images are a result of many factors. Your upbringing, surroundings, your attitude etc. So if you and I are interacting with the same person, you might have a completely different mental image than that of mine.
But surprisingly it is not the same if we both see the person physically. Based on their physical appearance we might end up having some common opinions about that person. That is because of the society we live in and some of the misconceptions.
A few years ago I started blogging at a major blogging site and interacted with many bloggers via comments, some became very good friends as we shared some common views on some of the topics discussed etc. I exchanged emails with some of them and had a certain image including their physical appearance:). I personally feel that reading someones work gives you a very good insight into who they are and how they think. Especially if you have written 100's of articles, your true self comes out and it's really hard to hide. That thinking is what gave me courage to make virtual friends through the blogger's world.
I became very close friends with couple of them after reading every single post of the 100's they published. One of them happened to live very close to my house and I met her a few times. Went over to her house for lunch, she came to our house. The mental image I had about her based on her writings and our conversations over phone and chat is almost similar to the the real person. So obviously I thought I am good at this.
The other person I met virtually, a very good friend of mine, proved to be different. I met him in person he turned out to be totally different than my mental image. How strange! It works for some and does not for others? Or was it just fluke that the first person happened to match my mental image but not the second one. How does this work?
Virtual friendship eliminates the guessing element about the other person's personality in the sense that you became friends because of the shared interest to start with, the site where you met. I met my friends on a blogger site, so we both like to write. Narrowing down, we both have similar opinions the way we commented on others posts or the way we commented on each others writings. You might not necessarily like every single thing they wrote about, some categories might be even alien to you, but you don't mind reading about them. 75% of the time you liked their work. That is enough I guess.
We are simply drawn to those people in whose presence we feel comfortable. There are some friends with whom we “just click,” and we recognize early on that our personalities are a good match. And with virtual friends the awkwardness of meeting in person is gone because you are sitting in your pajamas in your own home when you are talking/chatting with them. It is like talking to a family member. You can't take away the comfort zone that you have with a virtual friend.
So if your gut instinct says it is okay to be friends with someone you never met or you don't know much about, I think it is okay. That said, you might be dealing with someone who is completely different than what you have in mind. So we should always be careful but if you are really comfortable with someone be it virtual or real, it is perfectly okay to continue the friendship. It's okay to be happy!
